Hi Reader,
As you may or may not know from the last email the past month or so has felt really heavy to me. Not necessarily in my immediate life but for many, many around me. Yes, some in my personal life but nothing in comparison to those around me. I feel that heaviness and do my best to not bring it in too much but it is there as I want to provide support the best I can for those who need it.
This email is going to be solely directed in making sure you are learning how and why you need to take time for yourself.
If you enjoy feeling out of control, anxious, sad, depressed, overwhelmed, tired, on the edge of a breakdown you can skip this email because it’s for those who are sick and tired of feeling this way.
When I start to implement this in my coaching program(the 3rd step) it is ALWAYS the one aspect of health I get the most resistance to. And yes this is part of your health.
Taking time for ourselves can seem like:
-a waste of time
-taking away from your priorities at work or for your family
-taking away time you could be doing something “productive”
-a sign of being lazy just sitting doing nothing
Or the most common excuse
“I don’t have time for that”
Here’s why you NEED to make the time. And I mean MAKE the time because if we do not purposefully make the time it will never happen. We will end up scrolling, watching TV or doing so much for everyone else that we don’t have time for ourselves.
Making a habit of taking time for yourself first off does just that- creates the habit. This allows your brain and body to recognize those times when you are:
*anxious
*overwhelmed
*depressed
*in your head too much
*spiraling out of control
*feel on the edge of a breakdown
*can’t concentrate because of stress
Hey, even if you don’t have 10 minutes at the time you are feeling above you can just stop and do one of these 2 things to get you out of the feeling:
-box breathing; breath in for count of 4, hold for count of 4, breathe out for count of 4, complete until you are feeling better
-focus on a color in the area you are in, find all the things in that room or store or where ever you are that are that color. This will help you get of that particular moment you are in and allow you to regroup
Creating the habit of taking care of yourself will directly improve your ability to handle:
*stress
*things that arise in surprise
*those times of overwhelm when we normally shut down
*those times you don’t sleep well and are feeling edgy
*any other time you feel the anxiety, sadness, depression, overwhelm, spiral
We unfortunately are not taught any of this unless we purposefully reach out for the information, we need to take our health into our own hands and learn how to make the time to take care of ourselves.
So, how can you start to implement this?
SLOWLY!!!
On Sunday, take a peek at your week and schedule in 2 days that you will sit quietly by yourself for 10 minutes. Do that for a couple of weeks, then increase it to 3 days a week for a couple of weeks, etc.
If something happens and one of those times doesn’t work, it’s ok, take another peek at your calendar and find another time in the week. If you can’t find 10 minutes twice a week to sit and be quiet then most likely you are choosing to stay in the place you currently are and not wanting to change/improve anything.
If you’re saying- Uh Mandy, I have NO TIME for this. Then we need to look at your schedule because it is TOO FULL. Ask yourself why is your schedule too full?
Do you think you are the only person that can do things, not asking for help when you actually could ask someone for help. People usually do not ask for help because it makes them feel good/important to do it all- it is NOT medal worthy to be overbooked. Or they feel they have to control everything, this is also not healthy. So if you are the type that wants to do it all without help, think about how good it makes others feel to be asked to do something for you- ask them.
Are you saying YES without thinking and now you’ve said yes to 10 people leaving you no time? It’s ok to say no to things. You can use the words, “I am unable to help you out at this time but I can at this time” Or you can just leave it at “I am unable to help you out this time”, that’s it, no explanation needed. Most people will understand when you say no, it is usually in our own thoughts that make us feel bad if we say no.
Are you choosing to stay busy because you don’t want to quiet your mind because it brings up yucky emotions that need to be addressed? Part of health is dealing with the things that make us feel icky so we can get them out of our head and move on. Sitting quietly can be VERY UNCOMFORTABLE at first, hard to do because our minds wander but the more you do it the easier it is.
Are you choosing to not work on your health because it’s too hard? BTW- it doesn’t have to be, we as humans tend to overcomplicate things. Change is hard, this is not some new concept, but staying where you are is harder. Find your support system, accountability partner(s) and keep pushing through. It is worth it.
I know this is a long email, well mine always are- hahaha, but I am so passionate about your health I want you to understand that there are steps that are needed, the steps are not a race you can take as long as you need as long as you are making the efforts to push forward.
Do the things you need to do so you can feel better because living life feeling stressed, anxious, depressed, overwhelmed, tired is no fun. I’ve been there and even though I go back sometimes it isn’t for long because I’ve done the work to learn how to get out of it.
Have a great day Reader, and make some time for yourself this week.
Get That Goal!
Until next time friend,
Thank you for telling your friends and family about
Goal Oriented Health & Fitness so we can help them too!
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